A is for Anxiety (A-Z Challenge 2020)

In January of this year my hubby and I decided that it was time to move on to the next stage of our lives and move house.  I deliberated long and hard about whether it was a good move to take part in the A-Z Challenge this year (pun intended) given that we could be very busy, but decided on balance that having something to focus on might not be a bad idea.  Of course the decision on a theme was much easier to make – Moving House!  

Then Covid-19 put a stop to any ideas of moving so I’ve had to regroup and rethink my posts.  Which means I’m not as prepared as I’d liked to have been but here goes:

A is for Anxiety

It was hard not to feel anxious once we set ourselves on the road to moving.  Believe me there are plenty of things to be anxious about.

Will we find a buyer?

Will we find a house we like?

If we succeed in the above will we make it to completion?

Will we be happy in our new home?

Of course most of the anxiety is caused by uncertainty, something that someone like me, who has issues around being in control, find particularly difficult.  Regular readers will know of my toilet demon.  (For new readers see below.)  I’ve worked hard to keep the demon under control but as you can imagine during the process of trying to move it’s been much harder.  Especially when you’re exploring new areas, new homes etc.  I can say that I’ve probably tested out the plumbing in every house we’ve visited!

I’ve also found myself waking during the night and then finding it hard to get back to sleep as I weigh up the good and bad points of the houses that we’ve viewed and the pros and cons of different areas. 

Being anxious is also not helpful with decision making.    It tends to make me want to sit on the fence and do nothing.  But then we wouldn’t get anywhere so I have to be more decisive but then I get anxious over whether I’ve made the right choice!

At the time of writing this post we have a buyer in place but nowhere to go.  Anxious?  You bet I am! 

Now that we are in the midst of the Covid-19 situation and currently locked down, we cannot proceed with trying to find a property.  House sales have been put on hold.  Who knows when things will get back to normal or if we will still have a buyer?  Time will tell.

One thing I have noticed though is that now things have gone very quiet and I'm not totally absorbed with the house hunting process, I'm actually sleeping better. That's something positive at least.

Toilet Demon: the monster that says in my head "you'll need the toilet" whenever I'm confronted with a situation where that might be tricky so things like using public transport, sitting in the middle of a theatre row, going for a walk in the forest.  When the demon was really on the loose he could cause full blown panic attacks and stopped me from doing lots of things.  I've battled hard to overcome this and mostly I've found ways to cope. 

Thanks for reading my post.  Any good or bad experiences with moving to share?