Getting back into gear.

It's Mother's Day in the US today but we celebrated back in March.  However yesterday (13th May) was my daughter's birthday, her first as a Mum.  It was also the 5th anniversary of the death of my Mum so it's a day that made me think about Motherhood.  Strangely, my Mother took her leave at the exact time that my daughter entered the world, 4.13 am give or take a minute or two.  This picture is my Mum and me.

 

 

 

 

Mum with Rebecca

Rebecca with Nathan

My Mum didn't have perhaps the best example of motherhood.  Her Mum didn't make things easy for her.  As the eldest of 4 girls Mum was often looking out for her sisters.  Money was tight and having gained a place at the local grammar school only one set of uniform could be afforded.  Mum did a lot of overnight washing to ensure she was always clean and tidy for school.  The start of her married life was spent living under the same roof as her parents where she had the lion's share of housework to do.  And despite sharing the house until I was born (by which time my brothers were 12 and 7) there was very little babysitting done by my grandmother.

Fortunately for me that led to my Mum being very different.  She was mostly there for all of our childhoods, only taking part time jobs once I was older.  Once I was married and had children of my own she was always willing to babysit.  We lived close by and in addition to the babysitting she was often at our house, doing ironing, cooking and just generally being another pair of hands and of course helping with the kids, reading, playing games and so on.  I don't think I would have done such a good job of bringing up my kids without her help or example.  That might sound like bragging but I think my kids are genuinely the sort any parent would be proud to call their own.  They also had a great example set to them by their other Grandparents.  So it's definitely been a team effort and of course hubby played his part too.

Hopefully some of this has been absorbed by my daughter now that she's embarking on her own Motherhood journey.  Followers here will know it's been a bumpy start.  Baby Nathan was 6 weeks old on Friday but he's still only just over 5lb.  He is doing well but it's been hard watching my daughter having to cope with all the uncertainty.  The constant round of expressing milk.  Trekking backwards and forwards to the hospital.  Leaving him behind everyday.  The constant checks and ups and downs are naturally causing her and her wife to be anxious.  Thankfully it's definitely more ups as he gets bigger and stronger but I am so proud of the way they have coped.

We spent time with them yesterday and managed to get out for a birthday lunch but they were both constantly checking their phones for the time and messages.  Fortunately there was no call back from the hospital and all was fine.  We made it back in time for Nathan's next feed and although it wasn't how she expected to be spending her birthday this year I think Becca enjoyed it.

I realised though this week that I've been wallowing a bit.  It's understandable I know, given I witnessed the birth first hand and have lived through this difficult time along with them.  And of course anniversaries remind us of loved ones we've lost.  My children were lucky enough to have my mum in their lives for at least 20 years but I did miss her yesterday.  She would have been so proud of my daughter and would have made such fuss of the baby (if she'd been in her right mind).  But she would also have been giving me a good talking to along the lines of "Yes it's hard watching your kids struggle with situations and it's hard not being able to cuddle the baby yet but the world's still turning and there are still things to be done.  Get off your backside and back into gear!"

Thanks Mum, for everything.

Bone Tired 12/12/16

I'm sure we've all heard the term bone tired/weary but this weekend it definitely described how I felt.  My daughter and her wife moved home this weekend and hubby and I helped them.  In fact I've been helping on and off the last few weeks.

My daughter is just 3 months pregnant and has had to take things very easy under Doctor's orders.  My DIL has also had some health issues.  Moving came at exactly the wrong time.  I never thought they'd be packed up in time for the removal firm who moved them on Saturday but they were.  Just!

I spent Friday helping pack up the last bits and pieces and then bringing their cat back to us for the night.  On Saturday I had to be over at the flat to lock up after the removal men left and then come home before taking the cat over to the new house.  And then the unpacking began.  Hubby came to help and we got a lot done but we were back there on Sunday to try and get them reasonably straight before the start of the working week.  Fortunately it's only a 40 minute drive there.  Quicker than getting to the flat which was easier to get to by public transport.  That took an hour and involved walking and lots of up and down stairs at the stations.

By Sunday evening we were all exhausted but the move was complete and many of the boxes were unpacked.  The cat also seems to be settling in well to their new home.

Today I've had an easy day including lunch with ladies from church.  Very conveniently for me they chose to go to the pub at the end of my road.

Tomorrow we're going to visit my brother who has also just moved house.  Hopefully we won't be asked to do any unpacking!

Apologies if I haven't visited/commented/responded to comments much lately.  I'm trying to keep up with reading posts but usually in bed on my ipad which doesn't make commenting easy.  I'm sure we're all pretty busy at the moment.

Weekend round up

Phew it's been a busy blogging month thanks to the A-Z challenge and we've just had a busy weekend.

My daughter, our eldest child, turns 30 in a couple of weeks so we spent this weekend in the Cotswolds with all our children and their partners.  It was lovely.  The house we stayed in in Burford was lovely and we enjoyed clay pigeon shooting, a meal out in a very old pub, a tour round a whisky and gin distillery and a meal cooked for us in the house by a former Master Chef finalist. 

It's so gratifying to see all our kids and their partners together - they get on so well and we all had a really great time.

I took a selfie today! 8/11/15

 I took a selfie today.  Well actually it was a twosie.  Or a pairsie or whatever it is when the picture is of yourself and someone else.  In this case it was hubby.  It's not actually the first selfie I've taken.  I took some when we were on a boat trip last year.  I actually took a lot!  That's what happens when you use the burst function without realising what you're doing.

I wouldn't normally take a selfie but this one was a bit of a protest.  My daughter keeps bugging me for photos of her cat.  Clearly she and her partner are concerned about their cat.  The cat who is staying with me at present and who is fine!  

Lady

 

The cat, Lady, is still upset at the move to my house, as she is still not eating loads but she is eating and comes to me for attention.  She will sit next to me on the sofa and is happy to sleep at the end of my bed.  It could be a lot worse.  She occasionally speaks to me in cat talk too.  I'm not worried about her and they are over half way through their honeymoon now so I'm counting down.

Anyway the girls are keeping in touch via Whatsapp but each time the request comes in for a photo of the cat.  Today I did a short video clip but I also attached the selfie of hubby and me in case they might be missing us!

I think they are having too much fun to be missing anyone but clearly they have guilty feelings about subjecting the cat to the disruption of moving home albeit temporarily.  We did offer to move into their flat but it seems that was too stressful for them.  The tidying, cleaning etc that would have had to be done before the wedding was beyond them.  As if I expected to be moving into a spotless palace when they had been preparing for a wedding and a honeymoon.

Well tomorrow I will see just how messy it is as I have to go over there for a delivery.  I just hope they emptied the bins!

The Wedding Day 25/10/15

As promised the day dawned bright and sunny and in theory we’d had an extra hour’s sleep due to the clocks changing for the end of summer time.  Nick and I had a leisurely breakfast and then the fun began.

You will note from the picture above that this was a same sex marriage with two brides, our daughter Rebecca (on the left) and her fiancé Victoria.  It was a challenge getting two brides ready for their big day.  We had stayed at the venue, Sopwell House, the night before as this gave us two rooms for the brides to get ready with their bridesmaids.  Our room wasn’t that big however and when we discovered that the room allocated to one of our sons for the wedding night was available from first thing we decamped there to prepare.  Victoria also had to move during the preparations to the bridal suite that was allocated to them for their wedding night.

There were two make-up artists plus a hairdresser who alternated between the rooms plus the photographer who kept switching between the rooms too.  With 2 brides, 3 bridesmaids, mother of one bride plus relatives of the other bride it was a bit of a military operation to make sure everyone was suitable groomed and prepared for the big event.  But we did it.  Just!  The champagne might have helped.  It was lovely for me to spend that morning with Rebecca and her two bridesmaids.

We were almost ready when the registrar came to check that Rebecca’s details were still the same and that she hadn’t changed her mind.  Phew, glad to get that over with.

And then it was 3 pm and time to head down to the ceremony room.

The ceremony was beautiful.  The girls looked beautiful as did their attendants.  It was a civil ceremony but they had readings and the registrar was lovely.  Especially when they hit a slight hitch.  No rings!

The registrar asked for the rings from the Man of Honour who looked at her blankly and announced he didn’t have them.  There was an awful moment of silence then he repeated that he didn’t have them.  There had been an oversight and the rings had been left in the bridal suite.  Poor Victoria looked horror struck.  The wedding co-ordinator from the venue was despatched to retrieve them which offers of substitutes came from many of the guests attending.  The registrar wasn’t phased at all and was soon able to continue with the actual rings.

 The picture above shows the girls having just been given their marriage certificates.  The Registrar made a joke about them needed to hand them over to someone for safekeeping as brides didn't usually have anywhere safe to put them.  Rebecca was able to point out that her dress had pockets!

A wish jar - guests wrote notes for the brides.  They will open the jar on their 1st Anniversary.

A keepsake box.

Each table had a picture of places they had been to or will visit during their honeymoon.

Our immediate family plus Nick's Mum.  I'm the one with the hat!

Main course

Chocolate cake!

 The two brides at the front of the cake were crocheted by one of the bridesmaids and were really cute.

 After the ceremony there were photographs taken while guests were provided with drinks and canapes and then we entered the main function room for the wedding breakfast. 

Dessert

A proud Grandma with 19 of her 23 grandchildren.  Unfortunately the 4 French boys were unable to make the wedding.




Prior to sitting down for the meal the girls were welcomed in a traditional Jewish way, including a dance where the brides were lifted up on chairs while guests all danced in circles.  (Victoria is Jewish.)  

Speeches were given by the Man of Honour, one of Rebecca’s bridesmaids and then the brides themselves.  The Man of Honour had also put together a video of clips family members, including ourselves, had sent him with messages for the happy couple.

Then there was dancing until midnight.  They had a live band who played two sets during the evening and they were really good.

All in all it was a wonderful day.  Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and the story of the rings will be the anecdote that will no doubt be repeated for many years to come.

And next year we will be doing it all again for this happy couple - my eldest son and his fiance. 

Part one of the wedding blog can be found here.

The Wedding - part 1 - last minute preparations.

We seem to have been leading up to the wedding for ages and then suddenly it was almost upon us.  I had kept giving offers of help but the nature of these things are that brides don’t want to delegate too much.  I spent an afternoon with Rebecca on Thursday doing a few jobs for her including putting the rubbish out – housework has definitely been on the back burner lol.  I also had the task of pressing 4 cream pashminas.  With a steam iron that can be a bit temperamental, as in spitting out mucky water at times, which was a bit worrying.  But I managed to get them all pressed without any disasters.

Nick and I were also tasked with collecting THE DRESS on Friday.  Again, easier said than done.  The shop is in a huge retail centre with lots of parking areas and I wanted to park as close to the shop as possible.  I parked close to where I needed to be but having consulted with the shop assistant I attempted to repark in the best area.  Well I usually have a good sense of direction but I completely lost my bearings and ended up having to get directions by phone.  It was all very stressful but I got there eventually and we were able to get Rebecca’s dress and those of her two bridesmaids safely home.

Then the real fun began as we had to hang her dress up and let down the train to keep it from creasing up.  I was paranoid about keeping it safe so I had sheets on the floor and on the door behind it and one over it to make sure it didn’t get marked at all.  I made sure my hands were freshly washed every time I went anywhere near it.  


After that drama we had a relaxing evening with Rebecca and my youngest son and his wife here for dinner.

On Saturday I went off to get my hair done and then both sons and their partners were here for an early dinner before we set off for the wedding venue – Sopwell House, a country hotel with its own function suite and grounds.   This meant getting THE DRESS back into the carrying bag which was a bit of a challenge.  We also had to wait for a rain shower to pass over before loading everything into the car.  It was a great relief when we got everything safely to the venue.

It was a rainy evening when we arrived but we went to sleep with the promise of sunshine for the big day.

For part two - the wedding day itself go here.