My theme for this challenge is family and relations.
Sons “a boy or man having the relation of child to parent”
I was blessed with a daughter first who I’ve already blogged about and then followed two sons. I always thought four children would be a good number for our family. I certainly didn’t want to emulate my mother-in-law and produce eight but an even number seemed a good idea – fights would be more likely to be evenly balanced, especially if I could manage the magic two of each gender. (I never contemplated the possibility of 3 v 1 it was always going to be 2 v 2)
But God only gave me two hands! And when I found myself with three children under the age of four I didn’t have enough hands! And fitting them all in the pram was a challenge, getting them into the car, making it to nursery on time…… you get the picture. And I had help. My Mum was around most days during the week and my husband was supportive too.
Anyway we stuck at three. For a long time I was never convinced that I wouldn’t have a fourth, especially when several of hubby’s sisters went on to do so. But I remained sensible. Given the exorbitant costs of university these days I’m glad we did. All three have been to uni. Two of them did four years and I think we’ll be helping with paying off the loans for a long time. Oops that sounds as if I begrudge them their education and I certainly don’t. We are blessed with three intelligent offspring and naturally we wanted to give them the best possible start in life. (Hopefully they’ll remember that when I’m in my dotage and need care and support!)
I’ve digressed, again!
Our two sons are very different to look at. The elder one is dark haired and probably has more resemblance to my family than either of his two siblings. The younger is fairer and very like his Dad, at least to look at. They are different in other ways, temperament for example. The youngest is far more outgoing. The older one can seem quiet and less confident but with his close friends he can also be loud and he definitely has thoughts and ideas worth listening to.
A lovely anecdote I have of the elder son was when he was in Year 1 at school. He was always quiet at school. But bright. His teacher told me how that was what she liked about him. She could get cross with the class at times and sometimes might use a touch of sarcasm that mostly went over the heads of the pupils it was aimed at and then she would across at my son and he would have a little smirk on his face. He got her sense of humour. She knew he was quiet but he got it!
School reports were often then “needs to speak up more in class” compared to “needs to be quiet in class, especially when he’s finished the work, to stop distracting others”.
I’m making them sound like chalk and cheese and during their teens, early teens in particularly, they could fight like cat and dog at times. But they both have a love of football and running and they are now good friends. They share common friends and although the elder son has now moved furthest away from home we still see a lot of him and the boys will get together quite a lot.
They are also supportive to me. Their Dad sets quite a good example in the relationship he has with his Mum. I’m really fortunate that I married into a family that really values family if that makes sense and hopefully we’ve instilled that into our children.
Of course I think a great deal depends on the relationship their partners have with the in-laws. Hopefully I’m not doing a bad job as a mother-in-law (actual and prospective) and won’t be driving my sons away.